Youtube video- The Paint Ball Project day 22

The video begins with Bilal saying we are probably wondering what the noise in the background. We can hear a noisy crowd, and Bilal's face fills the camera frame but the camera is facing out of the immediate area into the greater gallery space. Waiters and wedding guests appear and disappear as they pass by the portal. Bilal explains the wedding is causing him to have tremendous swings of emotion. He is perplexed by by his motion and says "the reality is blurred, now". The gun was turned off for the wedding, at the request of its organisers. Bilal recalls the same emotional experience when the gun was turned off during day ten. Tears are visibly running down his cheeks and he seems to be staring off into space as he speaks.

He says that this time as he can let down his guard , he doesn't know if he could continue. He describes his emotions as uncontainable, crying then laughing and smiling. He says" I know it is only eight days to go, but I am so worried about my mind... I hope, I hope, I hope I am going to finish the next eight days. He feels that his turmoil is exacerbated by having "the wedding on one side and destruction on the other". He pans the camera to the wedding then quickly to the paint covered area then back onto himself, again. He says he does not resent the wedding as it is "a celebration of something beautiful.

However Bilal says this painful emotion results from his particular situation. Recalling the support he received from some one in the chatroom during his previous experience he hopes he will find a "new point of strength". The video breaks at his point.

When the video resumes, Bilal is back in goggles and armoured vest and in the yellow room, with the latest room lamp in the background over his shoulder. He says he friend Alicia had just called him and was waiting in the alley with dinner for him. He had apparently turned the gun on again, and as he left the yellow room, he bent low to avoid paintball fire, then stood up and replaced his goggles with spectacles, again commenting on the strange juxtaposition of the paint ball gun with the wedding and it's audible sound of people in social hubbub. As Bilal makes his way to the side entrance of the gallery, music can be heard in the background and we can make out the last melisma of the chorus of The BeeGees' Stayin' Alive. He says "Hey!" and waves to his friend.

He explains he can't step out of the gallery and asks her to come in. She goes to find parking and he says they will return. He comments the air smells so good it is torture. The video cannot convey the smell and texture of living in a filthy dangerous space. Then his friends arrive from out of the darkness.

"Hi Who are you?" asks Bilal. Michael introduces himself then Bilal points the camera at Alicia and introduces her, and Michael as her boyfriend. She says "You got a really bright light on that thing" referring to the camera light that makes them both flinch. Alicia says she got him extra spicy curry and chicken and he pans down to the bag she is carrying. He jokes that alot of girls bring him food but this time Alicia has brought her boy friend. They enter the gallery and the conversation is buried by the wedding sounds, then the video cuts.

Bilal is back in the yellow room when the video resumes. His typical introduction of "Hey, Everybody it's Day 22" has been moved to this last section. His voice is more up beat than in the beginning and he seems more composed in his armour and goggles. He says that with the gun active and the wedding over his emotional "swing" has ended. "All the emotion disappears. I don't know how to explain it" Bilal says. He shifts his position and sits on his bed and there is the familiar crack of the paintball gun. "I hope this concludes the day. Eight more days." He stares intently into the camera. Music is audible and it seems to be pop from perhaps Iraq. Then video ends with Bilal still staring into the camera.


This self imposition reminds me of the way we choose to confine ourselves in particular jobs, roles and locales in order to achieve something better. How Weberian, how modern? Is this how Empire recolonises itself?
Does this will to endure enable biopower that sustains Empire?



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HCBji8pQ-nM